This is the last blog post on the Trying Again Series and the Anxiety and Fear that comes with being pregnant after loss.
Below are some coping tips that worked for me on how to Handle the Anxiety, Fear and Stress that comes with Pregnancy After Loss.
Focus on one day at a time. Easier said than done, right? But I always keep my favorite verse with me that "All things work together for the good of those who are called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28 If God has called you to be a mother especially for you to have another child it will happen, it is his purpose for your life. I learned to take my pregnancy one day at a time because I celebrated what was good, different, and better about my new pregnancy. I paid attention to whats going well each day and how I was feeling and how the baby was moving and healthy. Remember each pregnancy is different, and the fact that you miscarried, had an infant loss or stillbirth does not mean this pregnancy will end that way.
Don't always expect to be happy and joyful all the time - We all have good and bad days when we are not pregnant so don't expect it to be joyful and happy all the time. Remind yourself that being pregnant again can be a scary experience.
Pray - Every morning when I opened my eyes I thanked God for allowing me to still be pregnant. Sometimes it is that simple. I was in constant conversation with God, especially when I went to the bathroom. I expected God to hear my prayer that I would see no blood, no spotting, or no signs of miscarriage. Pray, pray, and pray some more. Below is a simple pray to pray over yourself during pregnancy.
Thank you for being you and you alone. Thank you for blessing me with the gift of this precious baby. Thank you for comforting me each day my baby stays in my womb. Thank you Father God for easing all my worries, fears, anxiety, and negative thoughts. I decree and declare in the name of Jesus that I am strong, peaceful, in perfect health, and this baby and I are safe. I thank you Father for releasing all the fears and guilt surrounding pregnancy that I have felt in the past. I thank you for healing my broken heart from the pain and sadness from our last loss, and I ask you to comfort all women who are struggling to conceive.
In Jesus Name,
Journal - Writing down your feelings is can heal you throughout your pregnancy after loss. For me writing let me express myself in the purest form. I could not edit my thoughts like I could if I typed them out. I had to truly feel what I felt when writing. Journalling will also help you process your grief. Your feelings of grief will still be there and having a personal journal to vent in will help you process those feelings of grief and the new feelings of being pregnant.
Celebrate Milestones - Many women say that their anxiety and stress diminishes when they get past the date of their loss. Celebrating those milestones in pregnancy helps you focus on the next goal. Celebrate your milestones at 8 weeks, 12 weeks, 20 weeks, 24 weeks, 28 weeks, 32 weeks, 36 weeks, and 40 weeks if you get there. These weeks are critical in pregnancy whether its going from one trimester to another, viability (24 weeks), lung development (32 weeks), and full term at 36 weeks helps you look forward to what is to come. For me when I got pass 18 weeks with my Rainbow baby I knew that I was in the clear from having another 2nd Trimester loss.
Take Care of Yourself - Do what you need to do to make this the most healthy pregnancy. Pay attention to what you eat, increase your exercise routine, watch your activity like standing and sitting throughout the day, and do those activities that makes you feel good. Celebrate your milestones by scheduling yourself a prenatal massage and let them know you have a stressful pregnancy and need to relax. Try Prenatal Yoga and also meditation to help reduce stress as well.
Seek a Therapist, Coach, or Grief Counselor - Do not go through this pregnancy alone without talking to someone if you have constant feelings of anxiety, fear, and stress. All of these feelings are normal, but if you want extra support seek out a therapist who can support you and provide you with some coping skills to make this pregnancy as calm as possible. If this is something that you need. I am available and taking Coaching Clients sign up here to get a FREE coaching call.
Keep the Faith!