As Auntie Maxine Waters, stated last week in a confirmation hearing so eloquently she was "Reclaiming Her Time." She said what she said and she meant it. Now how about you? Are you ready to Reclaim your time? Not now, but RIGHT NOW is time for your to Reclaim Your Time and practice some Self Care.
When my son BJ passed away at birth, my physical body was recovering from a cesearean section. My boobs filled up with milk and were starting to leak every time I thought of BJ or would hear another baby cry. Everything around me was moving fast, but I was stuck mentally in the operating room not hearing my baby cry. I could not get back to life as normal. For my 11 week maternity leave I sat around the house sinking deeper into depression. My family and support system was there for the first week and during his funeral the following week. After which it was just me and my husband. We were there trying to make sense of what happened. He continued to push me to do this and that trying to get me out of my funk. Nothing was working. I just continued to sulk around and think "woe is me" until I started to journal my feelings. Writing was my way of reclaiming my time. It was my outlet to get all of my feelings out, and to not hold back. I also saw a grief counselor who helped me organize my feelings and make sense of them. They helped guide me through my thoughts and my journal saved me literally from going deeper into a depression. I'm sharing this story because I want you to reclaim your time and practice some self care, and for you to not sink further into a depression.
Why should you reclaim your time?
Because its your time to begin with. After a miscarriage, infant loss, or still birth we are left stripped physically and emotionally. We are trying to make sense of something that can not be explained. You have to take care of yourself physically and emotionally.
Rest. Write. Get a manicure/pedicure. Exercise if you feel up to it. Laugh with your girls. Take a vacation. Do whatever brings you joy. The goal isn't to get your mind off the loss, but rather for you to find joy again in those things you love to guide you through your grief journey.
Mentally and emotionally you should find someone to talk to. Say the babies name. Explain how you are feeling. Join a support group. See a grief counselor. Talk to your Pastor/Minister. Do not bottle up those feelings, you have to let them out in order to Reclaim Your Time!
How do you reclaim your time?