EP115 - Eliminating Shame, Guilt, and Regret with Post-Abortive Women with Latoya Mathews

Black Women and Abortion

Abortion and Elective Termination has always been a topic in the US, with many opposing views. Roe v. Wade was a 1973 landmark decision by the US Supreme Court. The court ruled that a state law that banned abortions (except to save the life of the mother) was unconstitutional. The ruling made abortion legal in many circumstances. With the 2020 presidential election around the corner, states like Alabama, Georgia, and recently Missouri are attempting to pass laws to reduce gestation age for abortions up to banning abortions all together, thus attempting to overturn Roe. vs. Wade.

For September we are exploring the healing and grief side of abortion on the Sisters in Loss Podcast. In the medical world miscarriages are called spontaneous abortions, and in this community we have to learn how to extend grace to individuals who electively terminate their pregnancies no matter their choice. Join us this month as we explore abortion stories and how healing, grief, and shame can keep all of us bound.

When today’s guest became pregnant with her daughter she sobbed to a friend “how was she going to take care of one when she had given up another” Latoya Mathews shares her abortion story, how post-partum depression along with guilt and shame of her abortion came alive after having her daughter, and how she has turned her pain into power by helping other post-abortive women eliminate shame, guilt, and regret of their abortions.

This episode is for you to listen to if you are ready to release the shame and stigma of having an abortion and want a community to help you.

Latoya Mathews Bio
Latoya Mathews is an author and coach who helps post-abortive women eliminate shame, guilt & regret so they can show up more confidently in the world. Her goal is for women to take those bricks (shame,guilt, & regret) they’ve built as a wall and turn them in to a bridge to cross over and experience more self-worth, self-love, and self-confidence.

Tell me about your journey to motherhood? What obstacles have you overcome?

It was rough. I’ve had to learn and unlearn somethings about myself that helps with creating a loving and nurturing environment for my daughter. When I became pregnant with her, I literally sat in my break room at work sobbing to my friend, saying “how was I going to take care of one when I had given up another.” I had to learn how to love her and unlearn lies the enemy told me. In 2007 after having my daughter, I knew nothing about post-partum depression. I couldn’t explain how I was feeling, and no one told me either. Looking back now that is exactly what I was experiencing. I can remember my husband going out of town, and my mother being there to help me. My daughter wouldn’t stop crying when I held her, but when my mom held her she stopped. I immediately ran out to the car to call my husband and I told him she didn’t love me. He was so confused and felt helpless. As my daughter got older though, I could notice my insecurities showing up in her and knew it was time for a change. What I was projecting inside was coming out through her. So, needless to say, motherhood has been a journey. Still work to be done.

Any books, tools, resources that have helped you on this journey that you want to share with the audience?

Lisa Bevere’s “The True Measure of A Woman”, Brenda Brown “The Gifts of Imperfection”, & my devotional “Discovery 31 Day Devotional”

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